Captain Hook

New place, new deer, new adventures, new successes & recognizable heartbreak. Captain Hook was a deer with a unique rack. Most would scoff at his antlers but he became one of our only hit list bucks on the new lease because he was an older deer & it was clear his rack wasn't going to change.

He was scarred up, his ears were cut & it appeared he was a fighter. We watched him in velvet at the water tank; his unmistakable right hook curling out of his brow tine were clear in all the trail cam pictures. We watched him at the protein feeders during the heat of the summer & decided he was a 'target buck'.

Opening weekend of bow season presented my husband with a few opportunities but it never came to fruition. We hunted him for over a month watching as he moved from spot to spot without much pattern to his actions.

The morning of Thursday November 10th he came into my set. I was nervous, shaking, breathing heavy, but I had time; he was calm. It wasn't quiet shooting light yet so the dance began. As the sunlight increased, his presence calmed me (well enough to focus) and I waited. Waited for the perfect shot that every bowhunter waits for. Hook was unaware of my presence & I drew on him twice.

But he danced & eliminated that little window of hope so I let down. A doe & button buck joined the dance calming him & elevating my nerves. 2 more sets of eyes to see me & ruin my shot. After 20 minutes of this, Hook finally took a step of his last dance & I released an arrow right into him.

It felt like a heart shot. It looked like a heart shot. He kicked like a heart shot. His legs buckled like a heart shot as he stumbled through cactus. The camera footage confirmed what I felt & although my arrow stuck in him I was confident I had done enough. I was shaking, uncontrollably shaking & breathing as if I had been holding my breath for minutes (I might have been the last few seconds).

I texted my husband & sent him the video. His response: 'heart shot, dead in 30 yards' along with words of congratulations. We waited over 30 minutes before we met to follow the blood trail. He couldn't be far so we started to film the tracking.

We found blood immediately on the cactus he barreled through & began following a bright red blood trail. That trail continued for 2.5 hours. We walked, we tracked, we pushed thru brush never losing blood for more than a few yards. His tracks were heavy in the mud. The arrow had punctured both sides & blood was heavy on either side of the track. After an hour the sickening feeling in my stomach started growing.

How is he not dead? What did I do wrong? Where is my arrow? How has it not come out? Maybe just around this turn or through this brush he will be laying there right? These are the questions I'll never have the answer to because after 2.5 hours the blood stopped & my tears started.

I tried to stifle them & be strong but now we had to make the heart wrenching decision to start walking back. I just stood there hoping for a miracle; maybe I would find more blood or him & I would get that overly elated feeling I wanted to feel so bad. It had been 2 years since I released an arrow on a whitetail & now I was hanging on a cliff emotionally.

We turned to leave & I fell off that cliff. Tears pouring as I walked blinded by the pain. My husband stopped & turned & embraced me & I just cried. The tears are here now as I write this less than 24 hours after it happened, in the same spot I shot him from. It was a purposeful torture to go back but it was the best place to write. It's fresh, it's raw, it hurts, its sickening. We made it back with confusion, disappointment & heartbreak weighing heavily on my exhausted body.

After breakfast (or almost lunch) we reviewed the footage again on a bigger screen. The shot still looked good & my confusion was still high. I have made many bad shots; as a bowhunter you will mess up, make bad shots, and fail miserably; it's just part of it. When I make those bad shots I know it, I acknowledge it, I learn from it & I fix it the best I can; but this has made my mind mush & it hurts.

After all is said & done the only conclusion I have deduced is my shot was too low. The downward trajectory forced it out the brisket & somehow I missed the pump station on the entrance. He didn't jump the string, he didn't' hunker down like 90% of all deer I've hunted do & maybe that was the missing puzzle piece all along. All the signs were there; the reaction of the deer, the blood trail. I'll never know if that's the answer but it's the only solace I have to tell myself to render this hole in my heart.

It's never been about buck or antler size & it never will. The feeling remains the same for any animal not recovered. I am physically & emotionally sick writing this & it truly breaks my heart. I can only pray that I missed vitals & he will somehow continue to be the fighter he was & survive this & I know I will have to do the same.

I've said it before numerous times & in a previous blog, this, all of this...it heals & it haunts & this one will haunt me for quite a while as I replay it over & over in my head.

UPDATE: I shot the buck on Thursday morning at 7:52 am...we hunted until Sunday morning & never saw buzzards anywherE.


UPDATE: On November 18th I went to hunt hogs & about 7pm (after dark) Captain Hook showed up at the feeder!!!! I could see his unique rack under the red hog motion light & stared in disbelief! He had a slight limp in his right side (arrow exit side) but was eating & seemed fine!

Dirty South Hogs (May 14, 2016)

It was Saturday night, which for most of you know that's #SaturdayNightSwine! I was set up at the Dirty South feeder spot & Tina was at another spot waiting on hogs. Trail cameras had shown hogs coming in before dark and I was pumped! It's been a long time since I've had hogs show up during daylight hours...

About 8:00 pm, 4 nice hogs came out from the left of the feeder; I was hidden behind one bush, sitting in a chair, bow in hand. There were 2 black ones & 2 brown ones; one of the brown ones was pretty aggressive bumping & grunting the other hogs & I could see he had good teeth on him. However, in past experiences I have learned with hogs that trying to be picky can sometimes leave you empty handed because they spook each other & move around a lot eliminating shots. The plan now is to take a shot on a hog that is most calm or presents the best shot first. As I waited for that shot opportunity the aggressive one broke away from the bunch & went to the right & was focused on me, or what he thought was something suspicious.

I tried to stay as still as possible because without the cover of darkness I knew I could be exposed. Finally, 3 of the hogs lined up for a great shot & I took it. I watched as my arrow went through the first black hog & stuck in the shoulder of the second brown hog behind him! As they scattered I was shaking & full of excitement but 2 of the hogs were still hanging around in the brush. I waited but they finally left.

As I sat there waiting I noticed my green lighted nock in the brush to the right of the feeder where the hogs I shot had ran. I decided to go check it before it became too dark just to see the amount of blood on it. It felt like a great shot & the footage confirmed it. As I was kneeling in the brush just 10 yards to the right of the feeder looking at my arrow, another group of hogs came into the feeder with a huge group of piglets!

Feel free to laugh along with me because here I am 25 yards from my bow, hiding in the brush with an arrow in my hand trying to figure out how to get to my bow without being seen (I had my 10mm on my hip but we have all agreed there would be no gun hunting on the lease). The only way was to go back around through the brush & hope they wouldn't see me. As I crawled through brush I was just hoping maybe if they only heard me they would think I was another hog & wouldn't spook. Somehow I made it back to my spot but on the back side of it leaving me in another dilemma. The lone bush I had for cover was my only hope but my bow was in front of my chair on the ground & getting to it would expose me if I moved the chair. I reverted back to my gymnastic days & planked across the chair while hiding behind the bush & somehow managed to get my bow off the ground.

One step down; next try to move the chair forward slightly so I have a shooting lane around the bush. I did manage to stick my arm through the thorny bush & turn the camera back on but off to my left was the aggressive hog from earlier watching me again. I looked & saw foam coming out of his mouth (which I confirmed later with a picture of some nasty slobber on the ground!). I was able to inch the chair forward just enough to get a clean shot. I launched an arrow at a small sow & my arrow zipped through her. As she ran off the piglets came right back! I grabbed another arrow & said "why not" as I launched another arrow into a group of piglets. A few ran off but they kept coming back!

I didn't want to use any more arrows on piglets because they can be hard to find so I decided to see how close I could get to them under the feeder. I began stalking to them & even though they would spook they would come right back. I was within about 8 yards when they finally decided they had enough of this game and left unwillingly. I was having a blast though!

Now the tracking had to start but let me set the tone for the weather...it had rained a little earlier in the day, it was hot with 95% humidity & every known bug in the area was out to annoy me. So lets go....

Tina hadn't seen anything yet so as she continued to hunt I started tracking the first hog. I found good blood & began crawling through the brush when I heard someone coming through the gate & a vehicle driving by just 50 yards away. I bolted out of the brush, slammed my head on a branch, saw a bright light (from the head hit, not the headlights of the vehicle ha!), & kept running to go see who it was. (There shouldn't have been anyone passing through the property however, I found out later because of a lock issue on the main gate they had to come through our property to get out a secondary exit). My spirits sank a little because they had just driven right by where my first hog had ran to. Hoping they didn't bump him I went back to the blood trail.

As the brush became thicker I was crawling on my hands & knees finding small holes in the brush to stand up from time to time to give my legs a break from being crouched down. As I was crawling looking for blood face to face with the ground I saw some eyes looking back at me. It was small & camouflaged & as I shined my white light on it, the bull bat (night hawk) freaked out & started trying to fly...except he flew right into my face! It was so thick he couldn't fly up & kept hitting the brush crashing back into me, flapping his wings, & crying out...or maybe that was me letting out some random noises as I lay on the ground covering my face from getting clawed or scratched! All I could think was Are You Kidding Me! How does this happen to me? Here I am in the middle of the brush getting attacked by a night hawk! After about 30 seconds of this going on he finally found a hole to fly up & away from me. As I lay there dripping in sweat, covered in spider webs & my arms scratched up, I just laughed out loud & realized that really did just happen!

I continued searching for the first hog but ran out of blood & decided to try to find the small sow I shot second. It had to be easier than this one & less dramatic! I went back to the feeder & immediately started following blood to the left. About 40 yards in I found her! Success without a bird beating! I searched around for the piglet but was unsuccessful, so I began dragging the sow out of the brush to the road. 

I made my way back to the arrow that had hit the second hog on the pass through of the first hog. I knew I didn't get much penetration but I had to finish the job & confirm he wasn't dead or wounded. I looked for blood but didn't find anything; I followed a few paths that he could have taken looking for any signs of blood, fresh droppings or even a wounded growl. I didn't find any signs & I was satisfied I didn't do much damage because the arrow hit & fell out within 10 yards of him running off.

I had been tracking hogs for over 2 hours now & was dripping with sweat, bruised & cut up from the crawling & thick brush, oh & the night hawk attack, but I was so excited. I checked in with Tina who hadn't seen anything but figured with the vehicle driving through the property the hogs probably scattered. We loaded up & headed home...but in the back of my mind I couldn't get over the first hog not being found. It was a great shot, I had great blood & it was driving me crazy.

The next morning I headed back out to look for the hog again; it had rained even more over night & everything was wet but I had to try. I looked for another hour & found a little more blood but never recovered the hog. My clothes were soaked, my arms were bleeding again from more brush scratches & somehow a worm made its way into my boot & stung my ankle causing extreme burning pain & swelling. I wrapped a baby wipe around my ankle to soothe it & decided I had done all I could do.

Just another adventure of chasing hogs & loving every minute of it! Enjoy the video, I wish I could have filmed the night hawk attack! Maybe next time!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eno3BCJfGxQ

A Love Story

I wish I would have met you sooner had I known how much you would change me. You gave me life and a new perspective on the world, something I never knew existed at such a level.

You were a challenge from the start; to learn your characteristics, your methods, and your tiny quirks, yet you still challenge me every day as I continue to learn, grow, and progress with you.

You have granted me the most intense heartbreak, consuming joy, and emotion filled days, nights, and years that could never hold a price.

We have been many places together, experiencing some of the most breath-taking views, adrenaline-filled nights and heart-stopping moments.

You have never failed me, never broken, never waivered; but I have misunderstood you, failed to trust you, or doubted myself with you. But those moments have to lead to growth.

Your artistry and refinement are systemic as you bend ever so delicately, yet maintaining intense strength and power.

As my hand grips around you, I pull you ever so slowly to me, and hold on just for a moment before the most perfect release. The rush of the flight is a spectacle to witness day or night as it collides in pure exquisite elegance.

Through you I see things differently, more focused and aligned, diminishing all the outside world and for that I am forever grateful.

Happy Valentines Day to my love...my beautiful bow!

My Furthest Bow Kill

It was a Monday night, January 18, 2016 to be exact, and I felt compelled to go out searching for hogs because I was unable to go on the weekend. I met up with Jackie, one of the girls who worked on the ranch, and we set out stalking for hogs. As we walked down the road we saw 2 big black spots running across the field in the dark; we tried to turn to cut them off but they linked up with another group of hogs that came into range before we were ready. Frozen in an open road with no cover and less than perfect wind, I stood and watched their movement. We couldn’t advance forward so we crouched and watched. Unfortunately they started to scatter, I stood and began to draw on one but they crossed a small hill and headed downwind of us eliminating any attempt of a shot.

As we made our way back down the main road towards the target feeder I saw another large group of hogs crossing the field. Once again we stopped and I watched them cross the road. This time we had good wind but they were splitting up and moving away from us. I was conflicted between continuing on to the hog at the feeder and trying to stalk this group. As I stood and contemplated, I watched the hogs; the group had stopped nearly 80+ yards away and 3 solo hogs had broken away from the group and were now parallel to us and the road. I ranged one of the solo hogs at 48 yards.

I was unsure of the shot at that distance. I practice out to 55 yards, mostly for elk hunting, but this was at night, in tall grass, on a smaller target, and out of my comfort zone. The hog I ranged moved away but another one nearby was still standing and feeding in the field, so I drew and decided to take the shot. My hope was that if I missed it would be a clean miss and the group would spook slightly, move on and we could continue to stalk to the hog at the feeder. The red light on my bow was dim at 50 yards so I took a few extra looks outside of the peep. I put my lighted 50 yard pin on the hog and released.

Although I have increased my draw weight to 47-48 pounds, at 50 yards there is still some time to watch my arrow get there. So as Jackie and I stood in the dark watching my blue lighted nock fly through the air I heard it hit! Not only did the arrow hit on the hogs left shoulder area, but it squealed, completed a 180 turn and dropped right in her tracks! As I began to freak out, Jackie was just as excited. Jackie is a hunter, but has never been involved in bow hunting and as she expressed “that was the coolest thing I have ever seen” I responded in disbelief by saying “I am not that good, they never drop like that!”

I ranged the hog again to confirm I wasn’t completely insane and it said 48 yards. Jackie tapped me on the shoulder and said “Candace, you were standing back here next to me”. Apparently I had taken a few steps forward after I shot to anticipate the hog running and I needed to keep my red light on her for as long as possible. So I took a few steps back to where Jackie was still standing and ranged again. 50 yards! I nearly fell over from disbelief but still had to finish the job.

As a bow hunter typically the only time an animal will drop like that is due to a spine shot which requires a follow up shot. With my pistol on my hip and my AR-15 in Jackie’s hands, we slowly made our way over to the downed hog. I told Jackie, if she gets up to run shoot her! As we approached I looked for my arrow in her spine but couldn’t see it. She wasn’t trying to get up but still breathing so I told Jackie to put a bullet behind the ear for our safety and to ensure faster expiration because I was unsure of where she had been hit. As we flipped her over to see my shot I found my arrow broken and bloody, lying under her body. To my surprise there was a broad head hole right in her lower shoulder where I had pierced her heart!

The rainbow effect of my arrow at 50 yards created a perfect downward angle right behind her shoulder and it had created just enough penetration to knock her down. I was completely baffled and stunned that I had just made that shot! Everyone told me I should have just said “yeah I am that good” or “I do that all the time” but my over-excitement clearly showed that didn’t happen all the time!

I practice shooting my bow quite often, I practice out to 55 yards, I even practice in the dark, but to see it come to fruition with a witness by my side, I was in heaven.

We drug her to the road and weighed her on our hitch hoist at 133.5lbs. It was officially my longest confirmed kill shot ever with a bow and one of the few shots where tracking was not needed!  I was impressed with her extremely long Russian snout and the smile on my face could not be erased for days!

My First Elk

Welcome back to Colorado. It was only our second year hunting elk; all DIY, all public land. We had drawn either sex elk (and mule deer) tags for the units we wanted and the hunt was on.

It was the third day of the hunt and we had seen a elk in a few different spots but all about the same elevation. We climbed up to a spot next to a narrow but deep ditch that continued to the bottom of the mountain. The hope was if the elk came from one direction it would force them up and over right into my lap. I set up right on a game trail seriously contemplating my spot and if I should move. My husband was set up 30 yards from me to call and our other buddy another 30 yards past him so there wasn't anywhere else for me to go.

After a few series of calls it remained quiet. About 6:30pm an elk calf jumped over some brush and stood on the trail 7 yards from me. It caught me off guard, but I just froze and watched. She crossed back above the ditch and all was quiet again. My husband called but not much response.

Finally at 7:15pm we heard a call back. A few chirps back and forth and I was convinced it was another hunter. I had never heard an elk in the wild (only on videos and calls) but it sounded too perfect; I was ready anyway standing with my bow. A few more chirps back and forth and then some heavy rustling around in the brush. There was no way this was a hunter!

My heart started racing as a million thoughts went through my head. Will they cross over, will I have a shot, what will it be, will they present a shot before it gets dark, stop shaking, dang it! my release came out of the D-loop, how far was that tree, and that tree...what are you worried about 90% of the shot windows are 20 yards or less, stop overthinking it, remember the vitals, remember all the practice...wait...is that an elk head?

As I stood shaking in complete awe of the vocal conversations going on between my husband and the elk, I was growing more excited. A huge smile was already on my face to be witnessing a magical moment of my husband talking to the elk! As I looked up I saw a cow elk head grabbing Aspen leaves with her mouth and ripping them off. Her ears were huge out to each side and I just prayed she kept moving into view. I didn't have a shot because only her head was visible. I saw the calf jump through the brush behind her and knew this could really happen.

Daylight was fading and I was trying to force my eyes to adjust to the mountain light and shadows. The cow slowly exposed herself from the brush and I drew knowing she was about 20 yards away. But wait...no it wasn't good. The grass and brush was so tall shooting upward and I didn't feel I had a clean shot. I held for a few seconds but knew it was wrong and I wasn't comfortable. Trying to let down slowly I hear my husband softly calling to her and she started walking again.

As I let down my adrenaline got the best of me and it happened too fast. My arrow fell off and hit the dirt beside me! Oh geez, I am about to mess it all up and ruin my chance! As she stepped behind a pine tree I saw my chance to grab my arrow and get set again. Luckily my husbands calls had kept her pre-occupied on him and not on me. As I watched her slowly come into view from the pine I drew my bow back again shaking and trying to calm myself.

She stepped between two aspen trees just wide enough to frame her vitals and then it was a blur. I don't even remember aiming, releasing or the impact. I heard my arrow hit...something...but it was so close and happened so fast I was unsure of what my eyes had seen. With a lower draw weight I don't always get complete pass throughs (especially hunting hogs with their tough shields) so it's not uncommon to see my lighted nock sticking out of the animal as it darts away. I guess I was expecting the same thing but I never even saw my lighted nock!

The final distance of the shot was an incredibly close 8 yards! There wasn't much chance of missing her but I could have made a bad shot which is much worse than any clean miss.

After the loud thwack the woods came alive like I've never seen or heard! This massive animal was breaking trees like twigs and her heavy footing broke all silence surrounding us. She ran about 30 yards straight to my husband where he said he could have reached out and touched her! He was so nervous she was going to trample him sitting under the tree he leaned back and she caught his movement causing her to run up another 15 yards.

As I am standing in my spot in disbelief wondering what just happened he said he could see my great shot placement and hear her struggling to breath as a typical lung shot will cause. I was so excited but confused of everything happening so fast, I left all my stuff and made my way to my husband. He confirmed I made a good shot and we just needed to wait for her to fall. Daylight was nearly gone and our buddy slowly made his way to us. We could barely see her as she took a few steps back towards my spot and then we heard the sweetest crashing and rolling noise my ears have ever witnessed!

Still in disbelief and scared of pushing her up the mountain we waited a few minutes longer. Animals can do crazy things and I was not about to push this beautiful elk any further up or around this mountain knowing we would be packing her out. Finally, we started by following the blood trail just to be safe and within 30 seconds our buddy spotted her first! Before I could even walk up to her I turned and embraced my husband with tears already flowing, the biggest smile ever, and complete euphoria and disbelief.


The moment I saw her will forever be frozen in time; her massive belly was its own mountain and the sheer size of her took my breath away. She was up against a tree and we needed to move her for pictures and to hopefully roll her down the steep slope some. Luckily we were able to roll her a short distance and then set up for pictures. Her head was so heavy and covered my entire body. Her hide was gorgeous, her face serene and I thanked her for her sacrifice and her meat.

We were able to roll her down a little more before we reached a path of no return. As we rolled her my arrow came out still in tact! I had punctured both sides of her but it stayed inside. (For size relevance my arrows are about 26 inches long and the entire arrow was inside her meaning she was much wider than that!) We had to stop and start quartering her up or risk losing her in the deep ditch and risk our safety. So the long process began in the dark of getting her valuable meat into game bags and down the steep, nearly 30 degree incline to the ice chest in the truck. We also found my glowing nock inside her while cleaning her! Although the distance to the truck wasn't miles the brutal hikes up and down 4-5 times was harsh.

Nearly 5 hours of quartering her up, packing her meat and falling down and up the mountain with just flashlights and faith, our rookie team of 3 had officially called in, shot and killed, and packed out a beautiful cow elk. I can honestly say it was one of the toughest and most rewarding moments of my life. Everyone was truly in beast mode pushing themselves beyond their limits. The falls, the sudden stops by trees, the 'just tuck and roll' or 'go with it' moments, the cursing as your frame pack hangs up on a tree, and the entire body exhausting process will humble you.
 

Final Words: WORTH IT!

P.S. I will have a special blog coming up about the custom calls we used and why they mean so much to us & the maker of them!

 

 

 

 

A Dandy Dirty Doe

2015 started off with a trip to Deep South Texas for a hunting trip with some friends. We had hunted this part of Texas before but never this exact spot so we took 4 pop-up blinds to help keep us mobile for changing deer patterns. Most of the set-ups already there were for rifle hunting so we needed to be prepared. The forecast was for rain, rain, cold, and more rain.

On New Year’s Eve we made our way south nearing the Texas/Mexico border; the rain had made the roads extremely sloppy and our trip took a nasty turn when our truck and flatbed trailer with the Gator on it slid off the road into a small ditch. It was a mess. We had to unload the Gator to use it to pull the truck and trailer out of the hole, all while it was 36 degrees and raining. Needless to say after a lot of messy, muddy work we finally made it to deer camp, completely soaked and covered in mud, but still excited to hunt.

 

The next morning we headed out to scout a few spots for blinds and found a some senderos that looked promising. After a few hunts with no success we moved one of the blinds to a sendero with a feeder on it. The brush in South Texas is extremely thick leaving only small roads or senderos to hunt, therefore baiting is almost necessary. Regardless of hunting over bait, this wasn’t going to be an easy task. We set up the ground blind in the new spot and brushed it in completely. I knew these deer were going to notice this new “bush” in the road but had to take my chances; leaving only a tiny opening for a shooting window I had to be as concealed as possible knowing these deer would be on high alert. I was 30 yards from the feeder and we had thrown out more corn in the road to help.

As I watched birds scurry about it was 5:15pm when I saw a very large doe step out into the road 17 yards away. The brush is so thick you cannot see the deer walking toward you or if they are in your area unless you are elevated in a blind rifle hunting. The trees aren’t tall enough to put stands in to bow hunt out of but the brush is just high enough to cover the heads of deer. The windows of opportunity bow hunting here were slim. As she stepped out, she immediately looked at my brushed-in blind and walked back in the brush. My heart started racing because for the brief moment I saw the front legs and chest of this doe, I knew she was a big, mature doe and was ready. I steadied my bow and waited for her to calm down and hopefully make a return appearance.

 

As I tried to calm my breathing and nerves she came back out into the road and headed to the corn. I decided to give her a little time to get comfortable (animals are always more alert when eating) before I took the shot. She finally turned completely broadside as I drew and released. I saw my arrow fall out the other side of her as she darted into the thick brush. I was shaking and just knew I had made a good shot. As I went to nock another arrow my heart sank. A bobcat crossed the road and stopped for a brief second (not long enough to get my bow drawn again) and headed in the direction of my doe.

 

Just my luck. (I have mentioned before that I have never shot and recovered a deer while bow hunting during a morning hunt. All of my kills have been afternoon or evening hunts where tracking and recovery is usually after dark or at dusk). It was raining, foggy, only 45 minutes until dark, and a bobcat was traveling in the same direction as my doe. So I prayed. Then I text my husband and a few friends to pray for a quick expiration and hope that the bobcat didn’t run my doe into another county or start destroying her. I was torn between going to search for her and keep the bobcat off of her or wait the full 30 minutes. I compromised instead.

 

I exited the blind quietly to check the impact site and arrow for blood to determine my shot. There was blood where I had hit her and my arrow had bubbly blood on it. I had a feeling she probably ducked a little when I shot and hit lungs instead of heart but I was confident after seeing the arrow and blood at impact site as well as blood on the cactus right on the edge of the road. I sat back in the blind and prayed again that the rain wouldn’t wash away the blood and this would be a quick recovery. I waited about 25 minutes and decided to go look before I lost light.

 

I only took my pistol because the brush was so thick I was going to be crawling on hands and knees and didn’t want my string getting cut by cactus, mesquite thorns, and everything else that sticks and stabs. I knew I had to be ready to shoot a bobcat that might have started his dinner on my doe and possibly recruited others. The tracking process was about 15 minutes, mostly because getting through the brush was so thick and the blood was deceiving because of the rain. I was alone because my husband was still hunting and I didn’t want him to miss an opportunity but I knew I couldn’t wait for him.

There she was, about 50 yards from where I had shot her. I could see her, but couldn’t immediately get to her because of the brush. I looked around for a hungry kitty cat but was relieved when I was alone. My eyes began to fill with tears and I tried to jump up and down and do my victory dance but the brush was so thick I cut myself on some thorns and stuck myself with cactus instead (well worth it).

I finally made my way to her and realized since I had been crawling and finding ways through the brush tracking blood, I wasn’t exactly sure where I was anymore or how close to the road I was. I tried to drag her but without my game hauler I wasn’t going to get far. Light was fading fast and the rain was steady; I had 3 flashlights with me (red, white, and green) so I left the white light with the doe pointing upward for a marker and attempted to make my way back to the road. My husband and friend were now on their way to me and somehow I made a quick exit to the road, pushing through thick brush getting cut up more. When I saw them walking towards me I ran to my husband crying and laughing with excitement and we embraced for that amazing moment we live for.

 

As we walked the road we found my white light and realized she was only about 15 yards from the road! We recovered her and headed back to camp to weigh the big girl. She was 130 pounds of beautiful venison, although completely soaked and covered in mud. I know that may not seem like a big deer to my Northern friends but in the Texas Hill Country a big doe is 90 pounds making this southern girl a fatty! She was my biggest doe taken with a bow and I was ecstatic to share another hunting moment with my husband and great friends. We were so blessed to hunt on their ranch and leave with an ice chest full of meat! That was one dandy dirty doe!

I also stayed true to one of my New Year's Lifestyle changes (not resolutions) and documented the hunt in my Rite in the Rain Notebook!

 

My MacGyver Moment

 

 

I always try to be as safe as possible when I am in the field, but sometimes things just happen; whether a pure accident or a result of my mistake, someone else’s mistake, or just me being clumsy. This moment happened during the 2011 deer hunting season. There were 3 of us hunting and the John Deer Gator we were driving truly only held 2 people up front comfortably; so since I was the first to be dropped off, I decided to ride in the back of the gator, while the warnings clearly say not to.

 

My ride was short to my drop off point, so it didn’t seem like a big deal. I rode in the back sitting down, holding my bow and my husband’s bow so he could drive. As he stopped he got out and I handed him my bow for some reason so I could climb out. I put one foot on the mini tailgate to step on and jump out, but the tail gate was not closed properly. This led to it opening and me falling towards the ground. All I could think about was I had my husband’s bow in my hand and I couldn’t let it hit the ground. If I dropped it he might have to re-sight it in, or I might break it. So as I fell toward the ground I raised my right hand in the air with his bow in it which only left me one hand to break my fall.

Instead however, my right knee absorbed the full impact being the first thing to hit the ground and luckily for me, my knee landed right on a rock. As I hit and rolled over on my back wincing in pain, I was still holding my husband’s bow high in the air. He asked if I was ok. My response….I said is your bow ok? He kept saying his bow was fine and checking on me. I looked at my knee and saw a hole in my leaf suit but only saw dirt on it. I said its hurts, but I’ll be fine; I just wanted to get my stuff and get to my stand. They drove off and I began the walk to my tree climber.

It became apparent that because my injury was on my knee, every time I bent it and took a step it opened the wound even more, causing more and more pain. I had on shorts (it was hot) with my leaf suit over the top which was causing more problems. The mesh from the suit was sticking to the wound. So I pulled the leg of it up over my knee to keep walking. I got to my tree climber and realized I was in for more pain. To climb the tree, I was going to have to bend my knees over and over to maneuver the climber up the tree. By this time, the dirt had worked itself out of the wound and blood was streaming down my leg.

 

All I could think about was getting in my stand and then I would figure it out there. So I climbed in pain and got settled in. As I set up all of my gear, I realized the first aid kit was in the Gator. Again not the brightest moment of not having some first aid gear in my backpack but lesson learned. I began to inventory the contents of my bag and put my MacGyver skills to work. I found a lens cleaning cloth that was in my binocular case which would be the wound dressing to absorb and stop the bleeding, at least of a while. Next I found my old back up head lamp that had an adjustable elastic head band. I removed the light and adjusted the band around my knee to press and hold the cloth onto my wound. It became my  homemade band-aid. I was able to pull my leaf suit leg over the bandage and was pretty much good to go.

 

The only problem was I could not elevate my leg sitting in the tree climber so my knee throbbed the entire hunt, but at least I stopped the bleeding. I still have the scar on my knee from that horrible fall, but I was a great wife by holding my husband’s bow in the air and saving it, even though my knee suffered the consequences. If that’s not dedication and awareness I don’t know what is haha!

Heals and Haunts

I mentioned in my previous blog “Baby Brows ‘Bout Time Buck” (http://camocandace.blogspot.com/2014/10/baby-brows-bout-time-buck.html) that I was working on a more ‘poetic’ version of the extreme emotional response to taking this buck…but to understand the highs, the lows must also be felt. In honor of the pure unfiltered bliss and bluster a hunter’s journey travels through I present this…I hope you can relate. 

  

Hunting; a consuming love triangle between me, my mind and the woods where learning how to fail is a staple of the journey.  It is a sickness that heals and haunts me, that brings me to the peak of my being and plunges to the depths of my soul. 

Before reaching a culmination of supreme perfection I press my face against the foundation of rock bottom where the cold, hard reality of heartbreak in the woods exists. Unfortunately this is not truly failure but a necessary moment each must turn and face at some point; however, in my mind and many like it, these are logged as failures long before a retrospective view is forced that ultimately leads to another scratch on the experience tree. There are moments where the bridge is burned solely to force a turnaround to face what you may have been avoiding or failed to see.

There goes my heart falling, falling, falling to the chasm created inside from a mistake, a misstep, or an uncontrollable moment only Mother Nature could create. When it hits, it hurts. It wrenches inside a pain that burns me, crushes confidence, ignites doubts, and envelops every thought. The world stops as a glimmer of self-pity sneaks in and weakness threatens to haunt me. I stagger and stumble through my mind in a cloud of disbelief, ambiguity, and empathy for any affected by this moment. It is a battle; it is hell on my mind, body and soul. Words cannot rectify it, comfort is out of reach and it is my solo internal struggle. Time, determination, dedication, and the inability to deny the fibers of my being will regenerate me and harmony will be restored; even if only briefly to carry on to witness the perfect moment we all seek. Unfortunately the return to heartbreak is nearly inevitable but it is the challenge, the moments, and the indescribable feelings inside that will always bring me back.

 After pure suffering through the dark moments of defeat, there comes a light that will shine brighter than ever before and blind the doubt that existed in my mind. With success comes renewed ambition, promise and confidence that the path I am on is deserved, honest, and merited. A successful shot is followed by a complete adrenaline release, uncontrollable shaking, tears, and a constant replay of the matter at hand. If the reward does not fall within sight all elation is stifled, just barely, by questionable ambivalence teetering on the brink of insanity followed by prayer. My heart is on the line, living in danger. Yes, no, good, bad, what if, please Lord.

But when that moment of confirmation arrives there is nothing, I mean nothing that can contain the passion, intensity and spirit of seeing the animal down. Typically I freeze in disbelief as my heart leaves my body and soars to the Heavens with gratitude and the tears continue to drain all logic from my mind leaving only emotion. It is raw, pure, unfiltered euphoria; a high like no other. As I move to feel the concrete evidence of my success and sustenance, the smile spread across my face can be seen for miles and is broken up with intervals of laughter as enthusiasm continues to exude from my body; in all forms of tears, laughter, dance, and embrace I am there in that moment and nowhere else. It, all of it, has come together. Perseverance, affliction, endless days and nights, Mother Nature, the intellectual warfare, physical complaints, and barraging battles unique to their own, all have collided in that moment and it cannot and will not be taken away…at least until the next meeting with the foundation of rock bottom starts its vicious cycle again.

It heals and it haunts…

Baby Brows ‘Bout Time Buck

 

 

*If you haven’t read my “Bittersweet Buck” blog, take a moment to go read that one before proceeding. It will help explain why Baby Brows is my ‘Bout Time Buck and add more meaning to this one. Here is the link: http://community.deergear.com/Article/BittersweetBuck I haven't updated it on my blog yet but its still currently up on the Legendary Whitetails page.

 

It was a typical weekend in the Texas Hill Country with rain forecasted which always seemed to happen when we headed there to hunt; it never failed it would rain at least one day but it was a hot Friday; Texas hot. We were hunting ground blinds in thick cedar (as much as I love being in a tree this area was not prime for tree stands, climbers, or even tripods so we had to forgo the hot boxes). It was 94 degrees and we sat in different areas; my husband, best buddy, and me, sweating, in shorts and snake boots waiting for the last possible moment to put on face masks or face paint. Rain was on the way the next 2 days so we were hoping for a successful hunt on Friday; It didn’t happen. We saw some movement but nothing legal or old enough.

 

 

Saturday morning it poured rain as we sat in our ground blinds listening to the pitter patter on the roof, watching a few drips come through, and hoping for it to let up and the deer to get moving. It didn’t happen. With a full moon and rain the odds were stacked against us but a cool front moved through with the rain and dropped the temperatures down to 59 degrees. The cloud cover from the cool front had blocked out the bright moon and Saturday afternoon looked to be the most promising for activity. We all made it to our stands early and I saw some movement about 4:00pm but nothing legal or mature. I was just happy to be in rain boots and pants instead of shorts and sweating!

 

 

A text message showed up on my phone about 6:30pm that our buddy shot a doe and he could see her laying about 20 yards from where he shot her. I texted back my congratulations and looked up to see a buck walk out of the brush. There he was standing broad side but with the antler restrictions in the county we were hunting I needed him to look at me or away to check his rack size. *The antler restrictions are for a 2 buck county where 1 buck must have one unbranched antler (a spike, 3 pt, or freak) and the other buck must have an inside spread greater than 13 inches, usually at the tips of their ears when alert. He finally turned to look in my direction and I confirmed he was big enough, a beautiful 9 pt. (The final measurement was 15 3/4 inches).  My heart began racing…

 

Trail Cam pic from the week before of Baby Brows

I was already in disbelief that this buck was even close enough to shoot. We were hunting a low fence, low deer population area with some of the most skittish deer I have ever hunted. They are definitely always on high alert compared to the deer I have hunted in South Texas and spook very easily; in 5 years of hunting this place the quantity of deer taken was low, well deer taken with a bow. The neighbors are content rifle hunting and shooting young deer or being reckless with their kills so our management of passing on young, although legal, bucks was in constant battle with those around us without the same management ideas. Regardless of what others were doing though we stayed true to our morals and ethics over the years and passed on young bucks more times than I can count hoping we would be rewarded.

 

As my heart started beating in my ears I made the decision of using my 20 yard pin. He was standing about 25 yards away because I had ranged a group of cactus in front of him at 22 yards and a group behind him at 28 yards earlier when I first got in the blind. I try to range landmarks early instead of waiting until the deer is in front of me to range distance so I can eliminate unnecessary movement. As I began to lift my bow, I caught a glimpse of another set of antlers in the brush so I pulled out my binoculars to look. He was a much younger buck but now I had another set of eyes to potentially bust me. My buck was now alternating between looking forward at the other buck and in my direction at the blind. I was completely blacked out in the blind with a long sleeve black shirt and black face mask but as I mentioned before, these deer are always on high alert.

 

I was trying to calm my breathing as I picked up my bow to draw. There wasn’t a breath of wind and the woods were dead silent so I knew I was going to have to be extremely stealthy and make small movements. I drew back but it was the slowest I had ever drawn my bow making it the most difficult. The adrenaline was pumping and as I lowered my pins onto his shoulder they went black. No longer could I see the fiber optics of my pins of green, yellow, red etc; instead my tunnel vision took over and I watched my top 20 yard pin hover over his shoulder. At this point he had turned in my direction and was looking at the blind. I watched the muscles in his shoulders for any type of twitch that would indicate he was about to run just as I released on him.

 

He didn’t jump my string and as my arrow slammed into his shoulder I heard the beautiful ‘thwack’ of the hit. He turned and I saw about 4 inches of my arrow with the lighted nock stick out. My arrow had passed through, although not a complete pass through, but I knew I had made enough penetration to drop him hopefully nearby. I could only watch him run a few yards before he was out of sight because the cedar trees are extremely thick; so I listened. I thought I heard a crash but my heart was still in my ears and I was shaking so bad I wasn’t sure what I heard. I fumbled for my phone to text that I had just shot a buck. Now the hard part…wait. I waited for about 30-45 minutes and my husband crossed the ranch to meet me to start tracking.

 

It was now dark and the ground was still wet from the rain and visions of my Bittersweet Buck danced in my head for fear of the same situation. I found blood at the impact site and both pieces of my arrow 5 yards behind there covered in blood. It resembled a lung shot because of the air bubbles so I knew the blood trail was going to be more minimal than a heart shot. We began tracking a small blood trail, marking each last spot with my lighted nock before moving forward. The positive of the wet ground was the imprints of his tracks as he ran and dug into the ground. We had only tracked about 30 yards when we saw a large pile of fresh deer droppings and a larger pool of blood. We both smiled at each other because that was a great sign! We both shined our flashlights up and there another 10 yards was my buck lying against a tree.

 

 

From where I stood I couldn’t even see his antlers but I didn’t care. I immediately burst into uncontrollable tears (yes ladies probably the ugly cry) from joy, years of hard work and never giving up, accomplishment and gratefulness. I just stood there holding my hands over my mouth as 100% pure unfiltered emotion took over. I grabbed my husband as he gave me a big hug and I cried. He walked over to him first because I was still frozen and ensured he was expired and grabbed his antlers. I finally followed and was able to see my buck as I took a huge deep breath. It is so hard to explain in words that exact moment and feeling especially after years of heartbreak and frustration; it was ‘Bout Time!!! (and if you couldn't tell the name Baby Brows came from his super small brow tines but they had character because he had green moss/tree leaves on them from rubbing - which I also found a fresh rub while tracking him!)

 

 

I filled out and attached my tag, loaded him up and then headed to pick up our buddy’s doe he had already tagged and field dressed. We headed back to camp to take a few pictures and hurry to get him cleaned and on ice. Although it was a cooler night, the temperatures still required us to get him cleaned, quartered and on ice as soon as possible. We decided on a European mount for my buck and wrapped his head up for transport. I was on cloud nine for the rest of the weekend (ok... I still am) and could barely sleep that night with such a big grin on my face! The entire hunt from start to finish was an out of body experience that I replay over and over in my mind that I will never forget.

 

I am working on a more poetic version of the feelings, emotions, sights, sounds and overwhelming joy in an attempt to explain that moment from my heart in a way that I feel will capture it to the best of my ability.

 

 

 

   Also I want to give a huge shout out to Deer Creek Cover scent who not only personalized my dirt foam soap, bar soap, after shower body spray, and scent cover field spray but kept me stealth in the field! This ground blind ninja is one happy huntress!